yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
