I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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