Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
