How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
