Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
