If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
