How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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