paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
