Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize