well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize
