your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
