I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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