Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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