Swine flu. Run for my life!
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
North Korea, Best Korea!
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
