they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
This house was built for laser tag.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I'm bleeding and have questions
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
