Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
