apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I think my moral compass just broke
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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