But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
