my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
