I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
