Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
