What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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