Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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