I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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