Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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