so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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