i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
