My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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