haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize