Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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