Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
