It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize