if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize
