I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Randomize
