It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
