I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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