last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
