If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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