i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
