I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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