4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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