You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Dear god my vagina.
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