Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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