I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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