Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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