You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
