my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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