So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
