It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
