you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
