"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
